This blog is going to be a rant so if you're not interested please exit now because these are my thoughts...
So I'm writing this blog as I lay stretched out across my boyfriends bed, grading papers and surfing the Internet. It's 10:42 at night and I'm here alone because my boyfriend is playing NBA 2K15 on his Xbox One online with some of his friends. BLAH! Seriously I don't think companies had girlfriends in mind when it comes to these game consoles and the amount of time that a significant other spends on it. I would estimate that my boyfriend spends something like 60 hrs a week on this system. 60 HOURS!!! Do you know what you can do with 60 hrs of productivity? Anyway, that's not why I'm here. This blog is about my current relationship rant...As he was conversing with one of his College friends they mentioned him coming to visit them on Cape Cod in the up coming weeks. Now normally this wouldn't be an issue for me within a relationship, but in this particular case I have a few.
1. Couples Vacation/Trip: Since we began dating almost a year ago we have yet to plan or take a couples trip. Every time I make any mention of planning one or at least taking a weekend trip he quickly shuts it down and gives me what he call "reasons" (or excuses in my book) as to why we can't go. Something as simple as traveling to Atlanta for a weekend trip is quickly given a judgement of no and case closed. However, when friends mention a trip he is eager to make the trip and very upbeat about it. An attitude he doesn't express when it comes to time spent with me.
Whether he knows it or not (as I have attempted to express) it really hurts my feelings to know (or at least assume from his conversation) that time spent with friends making memories instead of creating new ones with me is considered "more worthwhile".
2. Quality Time: I currently reside in Charlotte, NC while my boyfriend lives in Winston-Salem, NC, so we only are able to see each other during the weekends. I find myself traveling to Winston-Salem expecting to spend quality time with my bf. However I think our ideas of quality time are vastly different. He feels like me just being here make for quality time, whereas I would like to go out and do something. I spend Mon-Fri working and going home in the evenings. The weekends are made for living (as the O'Jays would say)! Not sitting in the house listening to him play NBA2K15.
...Now I know some of you may say that I am to blame for this because I am not voicing how I feel to my boyfriend in an effective manner, but I truly beg to differ. How many times do you have to tell a man something before he gets it. We're all adults and intelligent enough to know when the person we love is expressing true feelings or concern. However, if you are not in the space to accept it then change will never occur....
...In no way is the purpose of this blog to bash my boyfriend or paint a negative picture of him but blogging for me is a channel to express my thoughts and the way I am feeling on the inside. I love him dearly and see us spending our future together, however I need for him to hear me on this...
...So what I think I'll do during Pillow Talk this evening is truly try to convey to him the feelings that I have and pray to God that a part of him really hears where my concern and feelings are coming from...
If any of you can relate or have any sound advice to share please comment below.
Thanks for listening to my rant guys, and I promise the next blog won't be so emotionally charged! Now, I'm going to go treat myself to a Snickers Milkshake from Cookout because hell, I deserve it!
Happy Saturday Night! =)
P.S. Thought I'd add a photo of my favorite guy below. <3
-Allyson
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