Love in the Millennial Era

The older I get and try to navigate my way through life with my family, friends and lover in tow I am beginning to see a pattern amongst the millennials in my inner circle and the way we love in the 21st century. A lot of us grew up with either 2 parents who are still together or  eventually divorced, leaving a lasting impression on the way we view and approach relationships. 

I recently read an article that talked about how children of divorce view love and relationships in the 21st Century. We tend to love hard and remain guarded because of the realistic fear of our spouse one day leaving us just as we saw within our households as kids.

I myself grew up with parents who were High school sweethearts that grew a part as time went on. For me, it left the impression that no matter how long you are with someone or the history you share, sometimes things just don't work out.  

For many millennials this fear is all to real. The fact that we can actually consider someone's feelings besides our own and do that for the rest of our lives praying that one day they won't wake up having changed their minds one day. Talk about pressure! It doesn't help that we live in a society with a I vs. We mentality. The consumption of self-gratification is one that any of us struggle with. 

Call me naive, but I still believe in the idea of marriage and loving and accepting someone truly through it all. The idea that when things get hard and they suck that we won't give up on each other. No matter what. 

At the end of the day we may be a generation of self-loving, instantly gratified, materialistic, stuck in debt twenty-something's, however we want and desire many of the things that we saw our parents take for granted. Why you may ask? Because at the end of the day it's no better feeling in this world then sharing an intimacy so sacred with someone that truly allows you to live. 

❤️

Allyson

...Quarter Life Crisis...I Think...

This blog is for any woman who is in her late twenties and thinks she may be experiencing a quarter-life crisis. I know what you're thinking. A quarter life crisis. There's already tons of blogs, quizzes, advice columns letting you know that you may or may not be experiencing the big QLC, as I like to call it. But, this is my personal reflection on how I realized that I was in fact having a QLC...

...so earlier this month I celebrated my 27th Birthday. 27. It's still weird to say. Seriously, where did the time ago. Within a blink of an eye I went to and finished college, fell in love, moved away to a new city, began grad school, got engaged, ended it, changed careers, gained independence, found the man of my dreams, and began the process of living my life for me and loving every minute of it. But it wasn't until recently while surfing the social media gamete that is Facebook that I noticed how much life is truly changing around me (I know not the best idea when you're hormonal and in your feelings). People are getting engaged, married, having babies, going on great vacations, building their careers, buying homes, etc... These are the same naive and crazy kids that I knew in High School and College when we didn't have a care in the world and thought we'd be young forever. Boy has that changed! However, change is a part of life and that's a good thing... 

...the culmination of my own personal reflection and the reality around me has sent me into a frenzy of WTF am I doing with my life. Now I know some people might say not to compare myself to others and that everything that is meant for you will come in due time. And that's all well and good, but let's just be real for a moment. For those of us who grew up in two parent, middle to upper-middle class households, with educated parents who set the standard for what type of life they expected for us it's hard to sometimes not even consider meeting those expectations, even just a little. Whether it's through your career, establishment of a family through marriage, or educational goals, you want to at least give them 2/3 you know... 

...and we won't even approach this whole physical and emotional change that comes with approaching your thirties and this sudden urge to now all of a sudden want to settle down and procreate with another human being...let's just say that's another blog for another day...but hopefully soon...

...all in all if there is anything that I have learned from friends of mine who are older and have experienced this QLC and come out of it, it's that you can't rush the life that God has in store for you. Just enjoy life moments as they happen and learn to revel in the time you have for yourself, because once it's gone it's very hard to get back...so with that I am approaching this thing called a QLC and life with a new acronym, PLL, Pray Live Love, with a promise to myself to pray more, live better, and love hard...

Goodbye Quarter Life Crisis!



~Allyson